Badaxe
I lose like 20 followers every time I post personal shit, but fuck it, I NEED YOUR HELP. Every year my costume sucks and I go home ashamed and alone. This year must be different! Besides the obvious long hair, I’m 6 ft, 180 lbs, and sadly not buff enough to go as any kind of warrior/barbarian. What else could I go as? I need suggestions bad.
Bonus points if the costume has a mask and would look funny/awesome while I shame everyone else at the party with my strangely erotic dance moves. They can’t handle that fresh action.

I lose like 20 followers every time I post personal shit, but fuck it, I NEED YOUR HELP. Every year my costume sucks and I go home ashamed and alone. This year must be different! Besides the obvious long hair, I’m 6 ft, 180 lbs, and sadly not buff enough to go as any kind of warrior/barbarian. What else could I go as? I need suggestions bad.


Bonus points if the costume has a mask and would look funny/awesome while I shame everyone else at the party with my strangely erotic dance moves. They can’t handle that fresh action.

  1. tacticalsnake said: You totally could be some sort of barbarian without being too buff, although there is definitely time to some of that too.
  2. rideordiebunny said: go as Barbie haha
  3. jaz0r said: I’m gonna second Elric of Melnibone
  4. falsememes said: you could dye your hair grey and go as Terry Pratchett’s Cohen the barbarian. that’d work, right?
  5. juophoto said: Jack Burton
  6. capsep said: get a bunch of bros and go as dethklok
  7. yuckyduck said: Green man
  8. merlinscrapbook said: bad prince from hellboy 2, a barrow white from lord of the rings, member of kiss, guitar hero character, tars tarkus from john carter, long dead zombie samurai, zombie jesus?
  9. callofthemuse said: Maybe a traditional viking? Lots of fur and armor so no need for a crazy Conan body but still has that a metal feel to it. Plus braided facial hair is always awesome no matter what anybody says!
  10. ladybonerpatrol said: I think you should do something that involves huge metal spikes. Maybe made of tin foil or spray painted party hats. Maybe a big spiked codpiece.
  11. eyekilluminati said: go as THOR on CRACK
  12. portionsofeternity said: You could buff up quite a bit in time for Halloween if you put a little effort into it.
  13. porn-ninja said: Definitely something zombie related!!! The undead ROCK!
  14. hawksanddoves said: elric of melnibone
  15. misfitkotld said: Joscelin Verriul from Kushiel’s Dart.
  16. bootyregrit said: wonder woman.
  17. mrsamuele said: I’m glad you asked this. You should go as The Preacher from Johnny Mnemonic. One of Dolph Lundgren’s finest roles (not really). From what I’ve seen, you’re the spitting image.
  18. shipwreckmisery said: wizard.
  19. thebartolonomicron said: A sorcerer or some crazy robed wizard dude with a sweet-ass staff casting some awesome spell shit. With Wolverine claws. (p.s. love your blog)
  20. mirkokosmos said: or you could go as MANOWAR Album Cover from “the triumph of steel”! all you need are some tides, a hammer, a sword, a crown, a ring, PLUS 4 girls in chains, two of them with batwings.
  21. maid-of-monsters said: i’d help but i’m also a member of the shitty halloween costume club.
  22. spaceleech said: Toki from Metalocalypse. Add death-paint for additional zazz.
  23. jessidork said: Art-student-hipster-girl with Ray Bans & a topknot.
  24. blackstone-river said: I totally think you could still be a warrior/barbarian if you wanted.
  25. hero-inpace said: The Spanish Inquisition. No one expects the spanish inquisition.
  26. thisismchan said: Jay from jay and silent bob
  27. kgthunder posted this